Thursday 2 April 2015

Biff Bam Batman — a letter of appeal


Dear Batman

Please excuse what you must think a very low-tech way of contacting you. I  considered transmitting my message directly into your brain, but decided against it upon recollection that whilst you are a bona fide member of the Justice League, you are, essentially, human. It would pain me greatly were I to be responsible for inadvertently blowing up your head. So I have resorted to my trusty typewriter to communicate what is, to me, a very real concern — a concern that involves you — and it is my fervent hope that you will support me in dealing with this disturbing matter.

  Are you aware that a movie entitled Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is in development —indeed, is being promoted before even the plot has been determined?  I am, to put it bluntly, outraged and appalled. 

 I will admit that I harbour some degree of envy that you are able to spend your human life incognito as a desirable millionaire whilst I am condemned to being a clumsy dork. And it is also fair to say that I occasionally covet your ability with women (and your car), but I can claim with absolute sincerity that I bear you no malice, nor do I have any reason to suspect any malevolence on your part.  Causing no harm to anyone or anything of good intent is central to our code for living. To suggest that either of us would knowingly harm another champion of truth and right is nothing short of scandalous.

 My faith in the world I have so long protected is wearing thin. Must everything, even our reputations, be tarnished for the sake of the almighty dollar? To be frank, I am no longer sure that I wish to defend the planet these offensive violence-mongers occupy. I will not stand by and watch as my name and legacy are besmirched. I intend to put a stop to this outrageous venture and it is my sincere hope that you will stand by my side in doing so.


I await your response most keenly,

Superman



The song:

Gotta be a bit of Biff Bang Pow by The Creation (1966)

The Creation Biff Bang Pow

And the B-burning question:Batman or Superman?


I'm taking part in the A-Z Blogging Challenge during April with a couple of thousand other people you may like to visit.


28 comments:

  1. Totally Batman....Better sense of humour, better alter-ego, and way better car. Plus the bat cave is cooler than a telephone booth.

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  2. Superman without a second thought. He is truly super and he is an alien which gives him extra added points. Batman is a mortal with gadgets, anyone can do that (see Syndrome in "The Incredibles").

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  3. I love this post it is so fun and creative. Hmm, hard choice Batman is cool with his gadgets and his disguise looks respectful. On the other hand we have Superman the mama's boy with a cute clumpsy way. Turning out to be a superhero from space. I can´t decide but the underpants sure is a worry. Thank you for giving me a good start at my day. I am still smiling.

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    1. Thank you, Charlotte. You're always welcome at The Rock.
      Would it help if I broke the choice down to leather or lycra?

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  4. Up, up and away. Oh, excuse me sir, you're standing on my cape.
    I'm going to tick 'other' and write Super Grover.

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    1. Justine would be proud... I wonder whatever happened to that girl?

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    2. Oh, I thought you guys were still in touch.

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  5. Awesome letter and I totally agree with the Man of Steel... HOW ridiculous a concept .... as if!

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    1. Apparently the movie is set to come out next year.
      Ptui to that

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  6. Answering the question: Nightwing, obviously. XD (But most of all I'm a Marvel fan)
    Love the letter! This movie's gonna be awful. The new Superman movie had more senseless collateral damage than anything I have seen in superhero films, and it ticked me off. I don't know what the heck DC thinks they are doing. The Flash show is great, though! :)
    PS: I loved your comment on my epic today!! :)

    @TarkabarkaHolgy from
    Multicolored Diary - Epics from A to Z
    MopDog - 26 Ways to Die in Medieval Hungary

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    1. I'm with you about the new Man of Steel...
      My kids won't let me watch Flash - they say it's limp - but maybe I should sneak a look while they're not around!

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  7. Well dang that was fun... in a Biff, Bam... Boom kind of way!

    Welcome in the "B"... as a host I am stopping by to say thank you!
    Jeremy [Retro]
    AtoZ Challenge Co-Host [2015]

    There's no earthly way of knowing.
    Which direction we are going!

    HOLLYWOOD NUTS!
    Come Visit: You know you want to know if me or Hollywood... is Nuts?

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    1. Thanks in buckets... Hope the fun just keeps on a-coming

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  8. This was just . . . awesome. It's like he's a fan girl. And Batman, for sure.

    Good luck with the 2015 A to Z Challenge!
    A to Z Co-Host S. L. Hennessy
    http://pensuasion.blogspot.com

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    1. LOL... i think he might be a tad offended by that description

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  9. Very fun! Loved your B post. I kind of go for Batman.

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  10. It's Batman for me, definitely! :-)

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  11. :) I'd like to have both of them on my side... but my favorite was the song. Thanks for posting that.

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    1. Isn't it a cool song? Hope it had you doing the pony and the swim all over the place...

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  12. I just made Batman lego with my son today. But now, am really a Flash kind of girl (please refer to Grant Gustin).

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  13. Ha! I loved that letter. Very entertaining. I've always been a Superman fan, though.

    -Chrys Fey
    Tremp’s Troops - A to Z Co-co-host
    Write with Fey

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    1. I kind of have a soft spot for the Man of Steel too... more romance

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  14. loving your letter theme! unfortunately, unless batman has some kryptonite, he will be going down. i'm disappointed the movie makers feel the need to create such a film... sometimes the wrong people have too much say! ah well. it was a fun read! happy b day!

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    1. I suspect they'll start out enemies and end up a coalition... it IS Hollywood!

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